you were worth the wait...

dear sweetie,

you're here!! it's been a week and 1 day since you surprised us with your arrival, 3 weeks shy of your due date. i am amazed by you. i am amazed by your daddy. i am amazed by the amazing group of friends and support that helped usher you into the world. but, i am amazed mostly by God, His perfect timing, and His perfect workmanship. you are absolutely gorgeous. everyone who has seen you has instantly fallen in love with you and they should - you are a miracle. you came into this world hand first, as if to say "i've arrived, your wait is over." and i am so glad you are here. all the times i've cried, all the times i've doubted that you'd ever arrive, all the times i've envied and coveted a life that did not belong to me, and all the times i wished for you to come into our lives - all those feelings faded away the instant i heard your first cry. you are a precious soul that has entered your mommy and daddy's hearts and we are forever changed.

at this moment, i can barely hold back tears at the sight of your daddy holding you on his chest as he watches something on the computer and you are perfectly content and happy, safe and warm in his arms. sometimes i just watch and fall in love with you over and over again. knowing that you are mine and i am yours; we have a life together and i am excited to experience it with you.

i hope that i do a good job of being your mommy. i hope i do right by you. i hope that i will follow God in the ways of raising you the best of my ability that will bring Him glory and that will lead you to the truth of God and His Gospel.

i have never been so terrified, humbled, excited, and in love as i am right now. the task of parenting is huge and i will not take it lightly. i love you, buel burton newman v. you are truly a miracle and are loved beyond measure. you were worth the wait. i cannot imagine life without you. you are the perfect life to enter into our lives. thank you for becoming part of our family. i love you.


love,
mommy.

perhaps today is the day that i get to meet you face to face...

oh my sweetie...

we went to the doctor on friday to have the procedure done to try and flip you around and guess what!? you had already flipped upside. mommy and daddy are so proud of you and thankful that you were able to get into position. yesterday mommy had her last baby shower (a party where they shower me with gifts for you!) at pastor taylor's house - his lovely wife ms. paula who you will meet and who will give you many many hugs and kisses set it up and it was lovely. you got lots of fun things and everyone is so excited for your arrival. a few hours after the party though, something VERY interesting happened. the bag that you are in inside your mommy's tummy, sprung a leak! which means that in the very near future i will get to meet you! mommy and daddy called our friend and helper bridgette and she told us to breathe and to get rest and drink water. i went ahead and called the midwives to make sure that i do things the way they want me to in order to follow everyone's rules. they had me come in, checked on you and me and they said that you sound lovely! music to my ears. i love hearing that you're doing well, that you sound happy and strong. they checked me and everything sounds good with me too... so we have been given the go ahead to rest, eat, drink lots of fluids, and just wait until my body says it is time to go back to the birth center and work alongside our doula, support team, and midwives to get you here safely and happily. oh what a day!

i may get to see your face today. i may get to hold you. these thoughts get me through the pain that i am feeling as i type this... God has created my body to do this and even moreso, he has created you in His own image. what a beautiful gift life is. i love you, my son. daddy and i are eager to meet you. come soon.

love,

mommy

so soon my love...

hello sweetie,

daddy and i in hawaii... you were there too!

we are in the last weeks of my tummy being your place of residence and soon we get to meet face to face.  i get to hold you and breathe you in! your daddy gets to hold you and give you kisses and snuggles with that fuzzy beard of his. i get to feel you at my breast, to hold you until you sleep, to snuggle and stroke you. oh my lovely boy, i am so excited. it is still surreal to me that you are joining our family. you've already made your mark on my heart, your daddy's heart, your extended family's heart. i know i've said this almost every time i've written, but i just can't express it enough - you are loved by SO many people. so many people have prayed for you and over you, have cried for you and have had rubbed my belly just to get a feel of you before you arrive. you are cherished beyond words and will most likely be smothered with love and affection for years to come. oh my love... just a few weeks until we can finally see each other, instead of you just hearing my voice and me feeling your punches. oh the joy that is filling my heart just thinking about it!

currently, you are laying in a wonky position in my tummy. can you do me a solid and flip into a good position so that we can both have the most natural birth possible. i really want to be able to hold you and bond with you immediately after you come from my body, 10 months is a long time to be patient to meet you and once you're here, it will be incredibly difficult to wait any longer to see, touch, smell, and kiss you. i am going to an acupuncturist tomorrow to see if she can help you find your way to an optimal position for you to come into the world. and then the doctor's are going to try to turn you as well. however, once you turn, i bet you will feel awesome and then we'll be ready to meet! just a little hope that we can get you into a good position. but if for some reason, you REALLY need to stay the way you are, i know that meeting you will be beautiful and your daddy will do whatever he can to hold you and ease your entrance as best he can. he will hold you to his skin, he will sing and hold and comfort you. so no fear at all, no matter what, you are loved and will be cherished and taken care of. i promise.

the countdown is on. i'll see you soon. and until we meet face to face know this - i love you and have always loved you. i will love you all of my years. we have so much to talk about and i pray we never stop talking. i love you, i love you, i love you.

love,
mommy.