across the great divide...

hello sweets,

lately, i have been watching some old  movies that my family and i used to watch when i was growing up. they are "the wilderness family" films and tonight i watched 'across the great divide.' now, i do realize that by the time you are old enough to watch it, this movie will be close to 45 years old! hopefully you won't mind watching it with me! (so far, i haven't even been able to get your dad interested in watching this one. i'll persuade him one day.) i won't force you to watch a lot of old movies, but i will definitely encourage you to watch just a few that are special to me. i cannot wait to share this past time with you one day! these movies are something that your pop-pop, grandma, and uncles all shared with your mommy when she was just a kid.  i want to enhance your childhood with as much family history and as many inside family traditions as i can remember. i know you, your daddy, and i will create many of our own traditions and our own history as you grow up. hopefully, you'll want to remember and share them with your kids one day. however, that is a long ways away!

experiencing life. making memories. capturing moments. i hope that when you enter our lives, we provide you with a life that is exceptional. a life that is as joyous as possible. it is my prayer that your life will be beautiful and full of adventure. unfortunately, i cannot guarantee life will be simple. i cannot promise you that life will be without bumps and error. your daddy and i are imperfect. this world that we live in, is imperfect and most of the time, down right mean. there are a lot of things in life that i will want to guard you from. while i will do my best, please forgive my inability to protect you from things that will happen in life that i cannot necessarily fix.

i won't be able to save you from that broken heart when you break up with your first love. i will hold you when you cry and encourage you to the best of my ability. and remind you that no matter what, you are loved. i won't be able to keep away the sting that comes with experiencing the first death of a loved one. i will hold you and cry with you. i will pray with you and mourn and heal with you. i can't save you from your sins. i will pray for you every day. i will teach you all i know and be an example of the doctrines of grace. i can't keep you safe when you learn to drive and you take the car for the first time by yourself. i will teach you as best i can and prepare you the best i can.

my love, i know i say this often, but i want you to always know the truth. you will never have a lack of love surrounding you. you will never not be covered in prayer. you will never have to wonder if we will be there for you when life gets tough. we will do what we can to help you, as long as we can. because you are our child and we love you. you are apart of us. you are our blessing and heritage from God. we will do what we can to make life as fun, interesting, and special as possible. you have no idea, we long to experience life with you. whether it be exceptional events like travelling to thailand or london. or mundane, everyday type things like watching movies and eating popcorn. i want you to have as many awesome and memorable activities in your life. i want you to feel like your parents helped you and allowed you to live life to its fullest. i love you. come soon. its really difficult to have empty arms, especially with dreams as big as mine. its really hard to be patient.

love,
mommy.